There have been so many goodbyes I've had to experience, whether it be because relationships ended, or because I moved, or other people moved. Sometimes I think about how there are certain things that I wish I had told people. Sometimes I wish I had told a certain girl that I had been crushing on her for a year or so, but I waited too long, and a boy snatched her up, and then when things between the two of us grew into a better friendship, she took off. I used to be awkward when hugs happened between the two of us, but if I had hugged her the way that I hug everyone else, I think our relationship would've developed a lot quicker.
That seems to be a problem I have. I'm a very embracing person, but I hold it back too often, because my image seems to be getting the better of me. What's even worse than me not being as embracing is that other people would probably like me more if I was as embracing as I really am. I'm a lot more fun to be around whenever I act like myself. I'm crazy. I'm not kidding.
I'll never be good at goodbyes. I've decided it just wasn't meant for me to be good at them. But since I won't ever be good at them, I should just start to be very good at hellos. That's going to be my New Year's Resolution. To be better at Hello's. First impressions are supposed to be the best ones, so I'm going to start making amazing first impressions.
Steven, if you read this, this is for you. I miss you a great deal, and honestly wish that we had become better friends. I love you.
